"While many choices are hard, decisions still need to be made."
I’ve always been the one who is forever in love with fairy tales, romantic happily-ever-afters, and prince charmings. Growing up with countless Disney movies and Disneyland trips, it just felt like I was in the middle of a fairy tale, especially when there was never really a moment when I didn’t have extra ordinary feelings for someone. So in the middle of junior year, it felt extremely odd that for once, I didn’t really want to have feelings for anyone. I haven’t really been in many official relationships, but even liking someone was fun for me.
Throughout the year, I stayed away from falling in too deep. But now, when I’m faced with the choice of pursuing the possibility of a relationship, I’m split. One part of me totally wants to go into this, head on, and just see what happens, but the other knows I should stay away. It’s just the fact of the uncertainty in this situation. I know how I feel when I have feelings for someone, and even though a part of me really wants for this to happen, there’s just nothing there, and I’m actually really glad about that, because I know it wouldn’t work it out anyways. When I do wanna get into a relationship, I wanna make sure it’s worth it, for someone I’m completely crazy for. I’m not so willing to get into a relationship anymore because I knew there had to be changes made in my life about what was important, and this is the side of life I chose: the one that is going to get me towards my dream. The one that’s going to get me into my dream college. The one that’s going to help me become a better dancer every single day. The one that’s going to help me perform in a dance company later in life. The one that’s going to get me to write a book later in life. The one that is going to make me a Broadway star. The one that’s going to allow me to change society. The one that is going to assist me to make a change in the world. This is the fairy tale story I want. Yeah, one day I’ll start a family, and that’s going to be a whole new exciting experience, but right now, I really don’t care about guys. I still believe in happily-ever-afters when it comes to romance, but like Taylor Swift once said, it’s all about happily-ever-after right now.
Disclaimer: The title is an example of the “choice” definition on urbandictionary.com. Yep, that’s how I do it.
